Tuesday, March 29, 2011

While I'm Waiting

"Why God? What are you doing to me? I don't understand!"

 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
   neither are your ways my ways,”
            declares the LORD.
 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
   so are my ways higher than your ways
   and my thoughts than your thoughts."
-Isaiah 55:8-9

Patience is not my favorite virtue. Probably my least favorite actually. I have everything figured out, I know what I want to do and how I want to do it, and God's job is to make sure it happens and everything goes perfectly. Right? wrong. 

Who are we to think that we are smarter than God? His plans for us are so much better than our plans! How many times have we wondered what our Heavenly Father is doing to us, just to realize later that it was exactly what we needed at the time? But sometimes it's hard. SO hard to just trust Him. To just give it all up. Every part of our flesh is screaming "NO! You can't have my life! You can't have my plans and my dreams! They're mine!" 

Recently Jesus has been prying from my fingers parts of my life that I had tucked away in the "MINE" section of my heart. And it's been painful. More painful than I ever could have imagined it could be. But it's growing pains, because through the past couple months Jesus has drawn me closer to Him than I have ever, ever been before! And His love, faithfulness, forgiveness and Patience with me have been so incredible!

Surrender to Jesus is sweet, is it not? Hard, painful sometimes, but like healing salve to the broken heart of someone who has been carrying a heavy burden!

But there are still areas of my life that I simply have no idea about. I've given them up to Jesus time and time again, but He is still asking me to wait and to trust him. Ouch. I still have to wait? But I gave it to you Lord, now you're supposed to fix it! 

No, not yet. Trust me. Obey me.  Time and time again He says to me. I'll take care of it, but you have to let me use it!

Trust and Obey. Trust and Obey. Trust and Obey! It's been my motto for the past few weeks. A mental phrase that I have said to myself countless times recently. Through Tears, through anger, through pain, through joy. Striving to serve my savior even when it's hard! Even when it hurts! Even when I don't want to! Even when I'm impatient! Even when I don't understand! Oh Jesus help me to wait! 

I will serve you while I wait. I will give it to you, again and again and again! I surrender. Take me and use me the way YOU want to! 

I will serve you while I wait! 

Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Isaiah 40:28-31
28 Do you not know?
   Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
   the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
   and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
   and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
   and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD
   will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
   they will run and not grow weary,
   they will walk and not be faint.

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